tobermory's Diaryland Diary

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Blam!

I did more house cleaning this weekend in preparation for a Memorial Day BBQ. Yes I know BBQ’s are held outside and the guests would only make a quick detour through the house on the way to the backyard, but what if they came inside to use the bathroom and poked around a little bit? I couldn’t have them be horrified by the size of the cat-hair tumbleweeds. In addition to the usual vacuuming and bathroom scrubbing I really got into the nitty gritty of cleaning and I actually straightened out my closet. I put together a metric ton of castoffs to give to some lucky charitable organization and found out that apparently if you are a cute, gimmicky lip balm I will buy you and stash you in one of my eleventy-billion purses. I reshelved all of my purses and in the process cleaned all of them out. I found:

8 half used packs of Sniff tissues
15 pens
4 barettes and 9 ponytail bands
Over 30 crumpled receipts – gas, grocery store, Target, etc.
3 cute make-up bags
2 mini hairbrushes
Enough tampons to re-stock a whole box
Several mystery pills – ibuprofen? Acetaminophen? Speed? X? Who knows?
4 pairs of earrings I thought I had lost
3 small notebooks
-and-
At least 2 lip balms per purse – often several more. I have a lot of purses. A LOT of purses.

Why? Why do I feel compelled to keep buying lip balms? There were tubes, sticks, pots, tins – you name it. Every thing from the staples like Chap-Stik to big ‘indie’ names like Burt’s Bees and Kiehl’s to small earthy-crunchy brands like Four Elements and the Savannah Bee Company. Tinted and untinted. Flavors included mint, lemon, blackberry, honey, carrot cake, cardamom, crème brulee, and cinnamon. The irony of it all? If I use it at all, on a good day I might apply lip balm once. In theory I own enough lip balm to last me until the next millennium. I’m going to have to make provisions for the disbursement of my lip balm collection in my will. The other irony? The only lip balm I regularly use is the tub of Carmex that sits on the bedside table. I am imposing a balm ban on myself that will last until I get catch sight of the next adorable tin of balm. One more balm fact? I have a friend who always refers to it as lip BLAM which I kind of like and will have to appropriate.


Tonight is the last Awesome Ass class at my gym. My ass has not achieved the awesomeness yet but I imagine if I keep hammering away at the homework sheets I have a good shot at, maybe, not-flabby. We all need goals.

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4:21 p.m. - 2007-05-30

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