tobermory's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Will a little more fat bring a happy ending? I have an XM radio in my car and I absolutely love it. In the mornings I can geek out on Bob Edwards and his interview program (today�s full hour guest, Sinead O�Connor � she explained why she tore the picture of the pope in half on SNL) and on the drive home I can listen to Fred-44, the channel filled with the more obscure new wave from my high school days. I usually stick to these two channels with occasional forays to the XM college rock station XMU-43, Lucy-54 the more popular alternative hits of the 80�s, or Ethyl-47 if I want to get more of a taste of today�s alternative music. I rarely stray to the decades channels because they play songs that charted in the particular decade which leaves quite a bit of chaff amongst the wheat. If I listen to the 70�s channel I might get to hear an awesome pop gem by Cheap Trick but more likely I�m going to hear Olivia Newton-John singing �A Little More Love� (hint: if you don�t already know this song, for the love of god do not listen to a snippet on iTunes � it will stick in your brain FOREVER. I know of what I speak). But, last night I was channel surfing in desperation for something to listen to and on the 90�s channel I found Madonna singing �Justify My Love� which I think might have been her last really good song. Do you all remember when Madonna was relevant? I can remember all the phases of relevancy: the black rubber bracelet/mesh top/lace half-glove wearing kicky Madonna, the �Papa Don�t Preach� and �Like a Prayer� controversial Madonna, the stylish Herb Ritts photographed Madonna from the �Express Yourself� era � I�m sure there are many more personas that I�m missing. I can remember when every new Madonna video was a big deal. MTV would hype it for weeks tantalizing viewers with snippets and then have a giant premiere followed by a special on the making of the video. Of course that was back when MTV actually played videos. Madonna was relevant even to pain-in-the-ass, cooler-than-thou college dj�s (I know because I was one and I pretty much exclusively hung around with them). What happened? Now she�s Lady of the Manor Madge with a bad British accent, she�s done so much yoga her arms look like stringy plucked chicken wings, and she dressed like workout tape era Jane Fonda on her last tour. Ugh. I say bring back the cone-boobs and do a greatest hits tour. Also, her line of clothes for H&M? F-U-G-L-Y. But that�s a whole different story. Why is it that almost all weight-loss food substitutes are sugary or sweetened? Why does everyone in the diet food industry assume that if you�re carrying around a few extra pounds that you must have a wicked sweet tooth and it�s their job to find you a non-caloric way to indulge yourself? Is it just easier or more profitable to come up with sugar substitutes like Splenda and Nutrasweet? I can�t imagine that our food scientists are so dumb that they can�t come up with a fat substitute that�s better than Olestra - anal leakage anyone? I do not have a sweet tooth � I have a deep fried tooth and there is no substitute on the market that will satisfy the craving for a giant plate of crispy French fries with a side of tangy, melty cheese to dip them in. I can eat all the sugar-free Jell-o I want and Weight Watchers has a whole line of chocolatey desserts, but can anyone find me a reduced-fat, deep-fried mozzarella stick? Please! Help a girl out! Breakfast: Kix 2:20 p.m. - 2007-06-13 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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